EXPECTATIONS THAT TAG ALONG WITH FRIENDSHIPS.

Other than life,i wish friendship too came with a manual.I literally mean it.But then again,it doesn’t and that’s up to anyone to figure out how to deal with whatever is thrown their way.

Unfortunately,the unrealistic things that people impose on you just simply because you’re supposed to be their friend are extreme.

You will decide to start a boutique ,maybe even a candle business but because you’re friends with z he or she expects things for free.That’s the same person who would rather share memes on their feeds rather than links to your business or businesses.

The aftermath of not giving into their demands usually is being blocked,ill-mouthed or maybe termination of the friendship.This make me question the intention of the friendship from the very beginning.

If you simply want free things from your friends at least support them or understand when they decline.It’s good to have limits when it comes to business and friendship otherwise you’ll end up loosing both.

WHAT REALLY FRIENDSHIP IS

I’d define friendship as having someone’s back not only in their presence but in their absence as well,encouraging them when they feel low or not so confident,cheering them on when they have something good going on but above all,letting them know when they are in the wrong so that they can make it right.

DEAL BREAKERS WHEN CHOOSING FRIENDS.

Even in friendship,it requires some sort of wisdom mainly because nowadays people have mastered the art of exploitation.They no longer care who is hurt in the process as long as they are doing good on their end.

With this in mind,you can be a caring soul and with the best intentions for your friends but do they want the same for you?There are some deal breakers with those you consider as friends.

You might be in the friendship alone.So,what exactly are the deal breakers?;

• NEGATIVE MINDSET

There are people who generally don’t have anything positive to say no matter the outcome.What happens when you hang around someone who has such a mindset,you end up getting recruited into the same.

If you were always positive and hopeful about something,you start believing about the impossibilities.You’ll notice patterns therefore keep an eye on that else it will be quite a task bringing back the old you.

• LOVE BOMBING

This is usually where that particular friend or friends always showers you with sweet nothings and never once states anything negative.It may get to your head like you’re some sort of a god with no flaws but in real sense they want to control you.

It’s like a drug.Whenever they’re not around,you’ll crave for them and that way,you might start luring them with God knows what so as to have their attention.It’s a trap.No one is perfect,therefore if someone isn’t bold enough to let you know what you did wrong,you might want to reconsider the friendship.

• LACK OF SUPPORT

Friends support each other.In fact,they are or should be in the front line to help each other where need be.

If by any chance in anything you do, none of those you refer to as friends come through for you,then you’re in it alone.I believe that friends back each other up as well as caution each other in case one is going astray.

• DISHONESTY

If you decide to call someone your friend,and in this case,close friend and not just an aquitance,you expect them to be truthful to you just like you should be to them.

What happens when one constantly lies,there kinda creates a disconnect and that friendship usually is in the verge of dying.To avoid that,i totally belive in the policy of honesty in friendship,if not…i’d rather let you go lie elsewhere.

• UNRELIABLE FRIENDS

I feel like i should’ve began with this one.You can’t be friends with someone that’s never available when you so badly need them.

If they keep on ditching you countless times especially coincidentally when you need them or expect them to be there for you,that’s it.It’s all clear they have better things to take care of and you should let them do just that.

We tend to make excuses for people knowing very well that they don’t care about anything or anyone but themselves and i tend to believe that is usually to make ourselves feel better.

• UNRECIPROCATED EFFORT

Majority of the time we go to the extremes to make our friends happy.I’ve witnessed people be in uncomfortable situations all in the name of friendship.

For instance,you may not be into parties but because it’s your friend’s special day you make it an exception just for them.

The issue comes in when your friend won’t even defend you when you’re being trashed or maybe even check up on you when you’re badly off.I the energy is not being matched,it’s okay to pull back and maybe reconsider.

As i conclude,with true friendship,contact could be lost,but those memories will last for a lifetime.In life,we never really lose friends,we only learn who the true ones are.